This
year has seen the popularisation of a new topic in Emotional Intelligence,
namely that it has a dark side.
For
example in the 2
January 2014 edition of The Atlantic Adam Grant argues that if Emotional Intelligence is
defined as the ability to recognize, understand, and manage emotions then Adolf
Hitler, who spent years practicing his hand gestures and analyzing images of
his movements allowed him to become an absolutely spellbinding public speaker,
was one of its greatest practitioners.
According
to Grant another proficient EQ expert is the founder of Body Shop, Anita
Roddick She leverages emotions to inspire her employees to fundraise for
charity. As Roddick explained, “Whenever we wanted to persuade our staff to
support a particular project we always tried to break their hearts.” However,
Roddick also encouraged employees to be strategic in the timing of their
emotion expressions. In one case, after noticing that an employee often “breaks
down in tears with frustration,” Roddick said it was acceptable to cry, but “I
told her it has to be used. I said, ‘Here, cry at this point in the ...
meeting.”
Grant
argues that as people hone their emotional skills, they become better at
manipulating others. When you’re good at controlling your own emotions, you can
disguise your true feelings. When you know what others are feeling, you can tug
at their heartstrings and motivate them to act against their own best
interests. Emotional intelligence helps
people disguise one set of emotions while expressing another for personal gain.
What is seen on Shakespeare’s stage is
common in the offices and corridors of power.
For example ‘honest’ and ‘honesty’ appear 52 times in Othello, half of them used by Iago
himself. Iago is the master of the dark
side of EQ as typified in his famous ironical quote where he explains what he
will not do and why: "I will wear my
heart upon my sleeve for daws to peck at; I am not what I am." (Daws
are jackdaws – a bird noted for thievery.)
More
than two decades have passed since psychologists Peter Salovey at Yale and John
Mayer at the University of New Hampshire introduced the concept of emotional
intelligence in 1990. After Daniel Goleman popularized the idea in 1995,
emotional intelligence became a desirable moral quality for most people as it
was gradually realised that it is not always the best workers who receive
raises and promotions but the workers with the best social and political
skills.
However
while EQ can be used to help, protect, and promote oneself and others, it can also
be used to promote oneself at the cost of others. In its extreme form, EQ is
sheer Machiavellianism – the art of socially manipulating others in order to
achieve one's own selfish ends. Iago is
wonderful example of this and so are corporate psychopaths. Now there have been many recent studies that
demonstrate the dominant people in group situations are often the best at
deception. Even more surprising for the
researchers these people would openly admit that they would often (daily)
engage in anti-social behaviour.
For
those of us familiar with the seven Humm components none of this is a
surprise. A core emotional component of
the Humm is the Hustler. About 14% of
the population have strong Hustler component which makes them opportunistic,
shrewd, entrepreneurial, and charming. They quickly work out if you can help
them succeed in life and will adopt Machiavellian strategies if they think you
can. do the deal or not. They’re also
short-term – they want results now, or very soon. Promising an H a significant
financial reward next year will probably not interest them. They are very loyal
to their own families and team. But mostly they’re loyal to themselves and they
will work hard to make sure they get what they believe they’re entitled to. A personality with a high Hustler and high
Normal will often be successful in life.
The combination of high Hustler and low Normal is generally a corporate
psychopath. I have blogged extensively
about this topic and if you want to read some of them here is a list:
Amazing blog…. Really this is very helpful for me. Thank you for sharing this post. http://www.doortraining.co.in/solutions/training/leadership-management/emotional-intelligence
ReplyDeleteMy only problem is that the EQ technology you are using in your training courses does not include a person's temperament.
ReplyDeletePeople drive performance, emotions drive people, temperament drives emotions.
Emotional Intelligence is achieving self- and social mastery by being smart with core emotions.
Self-Mastery = Awareness + Management (Steps 1 & 2 as defined by Goleman)
Social Mastery = Empathy + Social Skills (Steps 3 &4 as defined by Goleman
However the key to emotional intelligence is understanding your core emotions compared to your transient emotions. Your core emotions are driven by your temperament – what you are genetically born with. Based on a study of 11,000 identical twins nature is around twice as important as nurture. I have found the Humm-Wadsworth model of seven core emotions the most practical tool for people to use and once understood (takes a day) dramatically lifts their emotional intelligence. If you want to learn about the Humm download a free white paper on using Emotional Intelligence in either selling or management . http://www.emotionalintelligencecourse.com/eq-free-white-papers/
My e-books available in Kindle format explain the technique in more detail.